Saturday, January 26, 2008
我真的有得选择吗？
不知多久了，才能用到电脑。就算用，也只不过是短短的半个小时，微不足道。好累。
从开学到现在，我好像没有真正的休息过。繁重的功课压力，也使我每次流下眼泪。说真的，我一点也不明白老师再说什么。我不会做很多问题， 在每个科目上都碰到困难。每次看着那白板时，我都会留下绝望的眼泪。我对自己感到很失望，讨厌自己。我真的能在目前的这个班继续生活吗？也许已开始，一切都是错误的。我，不属于这个世界，不属于
3S5.
老师，你对我说你会担心我，日日夜夜为我操心... 耀杰说你叫WAIKHIN不要‘欺负’我们... 我心里高兴。就算不是真心的，我也宁可相信那是您的真心话。因为，已经好久好久没有人这样对我说了。我那受伤的心灵受到了些安慰。你说找辅导员，也许对我有帮助。你说这样会好些，因为有了专业的帮助。而您说自己，只能眼睁睁的看住我。我愿意听你的话，因为你是关心我的。可是，去了哪，我好像变得更糟糕。我更是认为那辅导员很虚伪。他很像把我做的一些当成是青少年的叛逆，她根本不了解我内心地感受。好像我无缘无故，没事时就往自己手上割。我，也不像这样的啊。我也不知自己合时会如此。我为什么会不要帮助自己呢？我当然也想活得无忧无虑点。
我还有很多很多话要说。但是，我又没有时间把一切说完。
算了。你要的话，我也会去的。
我不会排斥，也不能排斥。我只能默默地接受。
Saturday, January 19, 2008
like i said, wait till im 21 before u say tt. why not just check me into a hostel? or buy me another house.. i HATE u. u understand it? u are so insignificant in my eyes tt i would rather u die off than irritate me every now n then. i hate u for being me EARTHLY FATHER. u are NOTHING, i say nothing, compared to my HEAVENLY FATHER. i detest u. i tell u. when u die, i wont even care. get it? ur voice makes me sick. i feel damn-it irritated when u open ur fucking mouth. nothing good comes out of it. GET IT? dun u fucking care bout me can? just LEAVE ME ALONE. n i dun feel like staying at home..
SCRAM. GET LOST. stop making my life miserable and upsetting my emotions.
irritating piece of shit.
VERBAL ABUSE AND SCOLDING ALR HAVE NO EFFECT ON ME NOW. THE MORE U SAY, THE MORE I'LL HURL ABUSE N HATE U IN MY HEART,EVEN THOUGH I DUN SHOW IT.
FUCK YOU.
I REALLY HATE U.
I HOPE U DIE, REALLY FAST. OR I DIE FIRST OSO CAN.
sorry for my language.
Monday, January 14, 2008
point taken.
i understood it fully. we will nvr reconcile. dun worry. we are onli tied together by name and blood ties. nothing else. this is becos, YOU DETEST ME AND I DETEST YOU. the sight of u simply irks me. ur actions are even worst. whenever u open tt damned mouth of urs, i feel like glueing it, giving u a tight slap. n same for u too, u idiot boy. stop calling me names. im not ur chu qi tong. however, i believe tt u think tt of me too.. we're quits. dun u get me to do something for u again.
ppl say u feel best with ur fam. but i feel like thrash. literal thrash.
wat is wrong with me?
arghs... i feel like crying whenever i stare at the whiteboard.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
参加乐团使我感到遍体鳞伤。
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
我为了你掉过的眼泪你忘了吗?
我和你的承诺难道不奏效了吗?
我相信你还是记得我的.我相信.因为我从来都没有不相信过你。
也许一开始，一切已是错误的。
同样的话，说的却是两个人的悲哀； 对这两个不相识的人发标。
换了班，难道就不一样了吗？
好想脱下那累人的面具，痛快地哭出声来。
但是，我做不到。不想程现那脆弱的一面。
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Psalm 61 O LORD, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure.
2 Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
3 My soul is also sore vexed: but thou, O LORD, how long?
4 Return, O LORD, deliver my soul: oh save me for thy mercies' sake.
5 For in death there is no remembrance of thee: in the grave who shall give thee thanks?
6 I am weary with my groaning; all the night make I my bed to swim; I water my couch with my tears.
7 Mine eye is consumed because of grief; it waxeth old because of all mine enemies.
8 Depart from me, all ye workers of iniquity; for the LORD hath heard the voice of my weeping.
9 The LORD hath heard my supplication; the LORD will receive my prayer.
10 Let all mine enemies be ashamed and sore vexed: let them return and be ashamed suddenly.
